Actually I really understand your condition , I'm going thorugh that also. It is just me & my ego who hide it . Professional actor maybe . I know you're strong, friend. Never give up :) I know you well , you can survive. Allah is there for you . Never lose hope on Allah that give us rezki all this while.
Umi said don't tell anyone about it but me accidentally told about 2-3 people that I trust and I think only one person who really understand. Perhaps. Stop complaining start to find an inisiative instead. Move on. There must be a reason behind all this . Allah is the all knowing :)
Semoga Allah terus peluk & jaga hati aku . Ya Muqollibal qulub
Jangan berharap dan menanti benda yg tak kekal , Allah ada . Maha Kekal
Bukan menolak tp tak berani. Takut sakit . Sakiiiit perit . Cukup memandang sepi sampai tiba masa nanti.